Browsing all articles in NES.

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer

There’s a chance this game could get freaking awesome toward the end, but I can personally attest to the fact that the first five levels out of six are bland, boring, tasteless, artless, thrown together, crappy, slipshod, who-the-hell-cares, quicky, dumb, uninspired, stupid rubbish. Any charm Twain’s original characters might have had is entirely absent in […]

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Double Dragon

Back in 1987, the kids loved the Double Dragon. One of the first “beat-em-ups” to really take off (and later be eclipsed by Final Fight), Double Dragon tasks you as Billy Lee, and his brother Jimmy as an optional second player, to travel into city slums and kick much ass in a quest to rescue […]

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Kirby’s Adventure

First you draw a circle, then you dot the eyes. Add a great big smile and presto, it’s Kirby! Those are the detailed instructions at the beginning of Kirby’s Adventure, the full color sequel to Kirby’s Dreamland for the Gameboy, and they couldn’t be more accurate. Simple you say? That’s because Kirby is simplicity itself: […]

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Metal Gear

Metal Gear. Where do I start? This is the U.S. version of the game that began the series that would spawn, in my opinion, the best Playstation game, and one of the best games of all time: Metal Gear Solid. It shows, too. All the elements are there, most notably the emphasis of stealth over […]

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Maniac Mansion

I love adventure games. There’s probably nothing in the realm of electronic media I enjoy more than a point-and-click adventure. Unfortunately I’m a reviewer of consoles, and consoles rarely get any of these for one very good reason: It’s a bitch to point and click with a gamepad. So it was, in my opinion, pretty […]

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Arkanoid

This game offered me something of a revelation, which I don’t think is listed among its official product features. But it occurred nonetheless. You see, I think part of the reason The Man approves of 70+ year copyright terms is because he can still make money off of simple arcade games like this. Tiny amounts […]

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