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Austerlitz: Napoleon’s Greatest Victory 

Austerlitz: Napoleon’s Greatest Victory

You kids today with your tanks and your missiles and guns that hold more than one round at a time are CODDLED! Back in my day, we waged war by standing in lines and shooting muskets at other guys standing in lines while cannons fired at us while we stood in line, and WE WERE GRATEFUL FOR THE OPPORTUNITY!

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Star Trek: Elite Force II 

Star Trek: Elite Force II

The Elite Force returns, now shooting up the Final Frontier with Patrick Stewart in command. Oh, there’s a mystery to solve somewhere in there too.

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Jurassic Park: Operation Genesis 

Jurassic Park: Operation Genesis

You’ll have all the problems of a major zoo AND a theme park, and the computers aren’t even on their feet yet.

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Quake III Arena 

Quake III Arena

As Internet speed and stability climbed, there was only one thing to do with all this new power. After you downloaded the porn, natch.

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The Sims 

The Sims

Oh, vannian tiomen. Taira mah! Erxfrushin dzoshtofin, shoon shoon. Eyen gimitz. *laughter*

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Kingpin: Life of Crime 

Kingpin: Life of Crime

Left for dead in a grimy alleyway, you are Thug – last of your race and heir to the throne of Radio City. Collect your Lead Pipe of Whacking and earn your way back to those who wronged you.

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